stupid story 2
Posted on September 27th, 2007 at 3:26 pm by peter

the poopy bread!

now we have all heard of white bread and some of us might have heard of wheat bread but has anyone heard of poopy bread?  yes!

poopy bread is the sensation that is sweeping the nation! people all across america (exluding canada cause they wierd) are tasting this new taste of amazing value and vertue. if u think you have seen good poopy bread, then try it with some mayo and holapeneos. yum yum. now what is poopy  bread made of? well in truth poopy bread is not made of poop at all. it is actually made of camals spleen. i know….

next time we go to egypt we need to eat some camals spleen!

stupid story 1
Posted on September 27th, 2007 at 3:24 pm by peter

one day in china…

one day in chinatown thier was this one chinese leader named ollie tabooger. ollie was bored after losing 8000000004 red pandas to a manacocker. he decided to make a army of giant cats to conquer sweden now conquering sweden was no easy task. first he would have to ask thier lunch(the dog(or as they would say the overlord of cats)if they could borrow some cats). so he went to his dining hall and asked his lunch if he could burrow some cats to attack sweden. the dog said “if you beat me in ping pong i will let it be done”. ollie said “ha! little do you know that i am the world champion in ping pong!”said ollie. so they went to  the national ping pong hall in the dwarven mountains to play ping pong. but when they got their they discovered that the dwarves were defeated by the cyclones! so they summoned the power of thor to smite those who go against them! so the conquered cyclones joined ollies army and they played ping pong. 


the match!

no one actually cares about the match so i will just skip it. the dogs one 8004 to -34000. so since 34000-8004=25995 they got 25995 cats. yay. then the chinese ate the dogs and took the rest of the cats. now they were ready to invade sweden! they moved thier army into position  when suddenly a huge army of giant pig came from venus and attacked their 400000000004 cats. the cats fight hard but the pigs are too strong! the cyclones are now ollies last hope. the cyclones pull out thier guns and started shooting down all the pigs. but the pigs were too great in number! the cyclones ran. they ran all the way to tralfamador where they mated and started a new race of tralfamadoreons. now back on earth ollie was selibrating his victory while playing ping pong and hopskotch. YAY OLLIE!

the manacocker
Posted on September 27th, 2007 at 2:58 pm by peter

what is a monicocker?

a monicocker is a blue elephent native too sweden. yay!
a monicocker is about 14 feet tall and can stand on his hind legs. they are usually boys because a girl is weak and can be beaten in duals very easily.

the famous manacocker

what do i do if i see a monicocker?

 if you manage too come across one than you have two choices. you can run for your scronny little life or you can challenge it too a legendary shot bunny easter sunday!(show buns east sun)

 if you win you get 1 mill in burgers but if you lose you become a goat and die!!!

how do i find and beat a manacocker in a dual?

first you need too perform the ritual of the ninth babydoop. too perform it you need two thousend bananas and a squirt gun. first build a cool shack with the bananas. when you finish the shack you need too wait for 23 hours and 57 seconds. when a invisable force starts eating your shack squirt it with the squirt gun. it will become visable and totaly under your command. do this 1056 times and you havecompleted the ritual. now you should have 1057 babydoops on your side. good for you. now you are ready too challenge a manacocker. now all you need too do is find it…

The only known place too find a manacocker is in sweden. go to the doggy inn house in stockholm and speak too doggy do little. he will direct you too the temple of the flying turtle. now the temple is too high too go to and live so the doggy do little will take you too a military outpost in atlantis. from thier you have too launch a nuclear missile at the temple knocking it out of the air. now drive too where it landed and get a book called you say patatoe i say patatoe. it is spelled incorrectly but that is how it is spelled. now take a branch from the tree of two brains directly 200 steps north of the present book. use the branch to slash the book in half and you will find the legendary manacocker!!!

now you must challenge the manacocker too a dual. that is the simple part. flick its right ear 56 times. it will yell at you too clean your room. say no and it will eat you. say yes and it will go back too space and never come back. so say neither. instead say i call fourth the legendary apoo nahasapenapetalon. the manacocker will take this as a threat and accept your challenge.

now how do you beat it? simple, run!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the babydoops wil hold him of while you run for safety.thier is almost no chance they will you need too help them. in order too do that you need 50 demon calfus. how do you get them? simple, kill 1 of the babydoops and they will come. they will cheer on the babydoops.that will give the babydoops a they fight for 20 minutes plus 10 min of comercial. now after that time only the ninth babydoop that you summoned will be alive. kill it. the demons will get mad at you for killing the babydoop and kill the manacocker. yay. now all the demons will explode in to 1,000,000 cheese burgers. yay. you won

if you did one of the things wrong you are a goat and you are sacraficed too the manacockers girlfriend. yay.

you should wake up in a big blue house. this is the home of you and you alone. you may not leave. you may never leave. you are stuck here forever.have a happy eternity.

second thing i ever said
Posted on September 27th, 2007 at 2:52 pm by peter

this is the second thing no matter what you say this will always be the second thing i ever say and u should always remember that because i won’t..

aliens are abductin our pants
Posted on September 27th, 2007 at 2:47 pm by peter

This is an incendiary statement, a statement that will change the way humans perceive themselves in their relationship to the universe. I know that it is time for the people of the world to be shown the truth, no matter how disturbing. It is also imperative that people understand that things are accelerating, not only the pants situation, but the entire universe is accelerating. Racing towards absolute zero, racing towards the big empty. The aliens know this and have began abducting pants out of anxiety, out of panic. All humans are aware of this acceleration sub-consciously, but their logical minds block the realization from materializing. It is my purpose to educate the masses, for a “society gone psychotic” is unavoidable, but perhaps I can save our pants.I first became aware of this in the spring of 1995 while having a blueberry stack at Denny’s. I had dropped my napkin and was reaching to the floor to pick it up when I noticed they were missing, and thus the three words first escaped from my syrup coated throat. “Where’s my pants!!!!!” A phrase that would be repeated by my tortured soul a thousand times over. At first I had no idea where my pants had gone and after this phenomenon had occurred repeatedly for nearly a year I finally sought help from psychologists. Intrigued by my problem, the scientists put me under a strict regiment of treatments that included: hypnosis, shock therapy, enemas, LSD, and Vulcan-mind-melding. After several months of this, memories began to surface. Memories of pant thieving aliens!!! I will not bother you with the details of these memories. What is important is that you know that this is occurring, and it will happen to you, that is, if it hasn’t already…i only wrote the last … the rest i found on my website just now…