ug stops global warming
Posted on December 24th, 2007 at 1:01 pm by peter

 One day ug was hunting chickens in Madagascar when suddenly, a huge wave emerges out of now where! He drops his chopsticks and climbs into a hole, he stays their for 20 years before finally he decides the wave is gone, now when he sees the environment it looks completely different. There are trees and bushes and it is hot! So he decides that global warming has happened, now why it occurs is controversial. Some people think the decrease of pirates caused the increase of temperature. But ug knows that when you are cold and you ride a bike for a long time you get hotter. So ug decides that to many people are riding their bikes. Only one thing can stop this, and only one person can stop this. And in that moment he decides who will stop this. Well not really, he takes a few moments to decide between chuck Norris, curios George and himself.  But he decides himself. He decides that he shall assassinate all bikes!           He must find and destroy all bikes, and for this he must need extraordinary help! Like Santa. Now how to convince Santa. He then thinks of a plan! A perfect plan! He goes to the north pole and tells Santa that he must assassinate all bikes! Santa of course said “no!”. but then ug said that it would work toward him if he killed all bikes outside of his workshop. Cause then no one would have a bike, he could just make a bike for everyone and he is ready for Christmas. So Santa agrees.            Now Santa has to kill all of the bikes in the world. But how? He knows there is only one way to do it. So he drops to his knees and prays, prays to the Flying Spaghetti Monster. So the FSM appears. He comes and asks what Santa wants. Santa said “I want you to kill every bikes out their! So the FSM thinks about it. Then he said only if you give ug 2000 pounds of TNT. So Santa agrees. The FSM spreads his noodly appendages and said “then let it be done” and disappears.            Now the world is in panic, all their bikes are gone and they have to wait until December 26th to get them, cause you know that they are  visiting relatives and it’s not like they can ride it back. Now then Santa invites ug back down to the north pole and said “ok I dunno why but the FSM wanted me to give this to you” and hands him the TNT. Then ug said “yay” and as he is leaving he throws 2000 pounds of TNT over his shoulder into the workshop. In a quick boom the workshop is destroyed. And with that global warming is solved. Now this is not a true story but it is possible. This could happen if you wanted it to, just stop Christmas and no more temperatures above 120 degrees!

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